For those of you who know a lot about the KonMari Method, I'm sure this question sparked some interest because it is a question you've probably asked before. For those of you who have no idea what I'm talking about, the KonMari Method of decluttering was invented by Marie Kondo and focuses on choosing what to keep and what to get rid of based on picking up each item and asking yourself, "Does this spark joy?"
Some people love this question and find it very helpful in sorting and purging their clutter. For others, they get very bogged down by the idea because most of their stuff doesn't spark joy, although they may like or value their items.
This is what I have to say on the subject.
I believe it is a very, very helpful question... once you know how to apply it for yourself. If you think you must get a feeling of overwhelming excitement every time you pick up an item you have to keep, this is not going to work.
There is going to be a wide range of feelings you get when sorting your things. These feelings may include meh, slight happiness, slight stress, attachment, guilt, irritation, confusion, nostalgia, fear, wondering, anger, and/or joy. So it is unrealistic to assume you will feel a "spark of joy" every time you pick up an item you need or like.
However... this does not mean the question is not helpful.
Let's look at an example. When you pick up your high school sports team jersey, you ask yourself, "Does this spark joy?" Perhaps when thinking about it you feel a combination of nostalgia, attachment, guilt, and happiness. You feel nostalgia because it brings back lots of memories; attachment because you don't think you could let it go; guilt for keeping it even though you haven't worn it in years; and happiness because it reminds you of good friends and good times. I would say this mix of feelings does equate to joy. Therefore you should keep the jersey, especially if you can come up with a way to display it and therefore, enjoy it more.
Now perhaps instead when you pick up your jersey, you feel a combination of nostalgia, attachment, guilt, and anger. You feel nostalgia, attachment, and guilt for the same reasons as above, but instead of happiness you feel anger because it reminds you of your high school team coach who was really mean to you and always put you on the bench. This mix of feelings would be a good reason to let go of it it clearly does not bring you joy. Although you feel nostalgia and a strong attachment to it, it doesn't bring back good memories. Therefore you should not display it to constantly remind yourself of bad times. Remind yourself you have photos of high school to look back on some better memories, and let this item go.
In either of these two scenarios, asking the question helped you come to a decision. So it was helpful, even if you didn't exactly feel joy in either at first.
Now, some items will not bring up strong good or bad emotions. Perhaps you pick up a piece of décor in your living room and realize it doesn't make you feel anything. Then you can think about other questions such as, "Do I want to keep a piece of décor that doesn't make me feel joy?" or "Does it make my living room look more put together?" or maybe "Does it just clutter up my space?" After answering those questions, your answer should come easier. And if you decide to keep it, you are doing so because it improves your space, and if that gives you joy, then so does the item itself.
Although the KonMari Method does encourage you to get rid of anything that doesn't spark joy, she also encourages you to improve your ability to sense if something gives you joy or not. The more you go through and make decisions on, the better you will be at realizing if something makes you feel joy or not.
Finally, Marie Kondo never "makes" someone get rid of something they need. If you really need it or want it, she encourages to think about how having that item actually does give you joy, like I did in the above examples. For instance if you have tax documents you have to keep, those probably don't make anyone feel a sense of joy at first, even Marie Kondo. But think about how you would feel if you didn't have them. You would suddenly feel very stressed without them. Right? So having them gives you joy that you don't have to worry about what to do when tax season comes or if you get audited. Even though the joy is small, it's still there.
I hope you found this explanation helpful. Whether or not you decide to use this question to declutter, I hope you at least have a better idea of how to think about your possessions.
Next week I'll share my favorite question to ask when decluttering. If you aren't already, follow me on Instagram @elenasdeclutter to get notified of when I post new content.
Comment below what your favorite question to use is. If you put a really creative question, maybe I'll even write a post about it...
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